★ Samwise rides again » Blog Archive » What the … Bi-cycle-sexual ★:

From Aunty …

A man caught trying to have sex with his bicycle has been sentenced

I would bet serious money (or at least a drink) on this guy having ridden (not like that) for far too long on bicycles in the course of his life so that he did wind up switching far too many molecules with his bicycle… enough to draw him to the… fairer… ehm, not quite sex, but, well, drawing him, sexually, to bicycles. I bet if you dug you’d find that this wasn’t his normal bike at all, but one that his regular bike fancied or something.
Look it up, you’ll see what I mean:

“The Third Policeman” (Flann O’Brien)